Category Archives: Marriage Counseling

Divorce Risk Factors: Are You At A High Risk Of Divorce?

divorce risk factors

National statistics show that nearly half of American marriages end in divorce. Those statistics have been on the decline over the last decade, but there is still a large portion of the population that sees an end to their relationship before it’s ever really begun. Premarital counseling, marriage counseling, and divorce prevention counseling can help you avoid being on the bad end of the numbers, but some couples are naturally at a higher risk for divorce than others. Listed below are some common divorce risk factors you can watch out for in your marriage.

Young Age

Younger adults are at a higher risk of divorce than older adults. Much of this spawns from maturity and self-discovery. Even though 18 is considered the age of adulthood here in America, many adults spend a portion of their early 20’s growing up and discovering who they truly are and want to be. This growth can lead a husband and wife in two different directions, making them less compatible than they were when they were younger.

Michigan has a relatively high average age for first marriages. Men in this state marry between the ages of 28 and 29, and women get married around the age of 27. These are averages though, and they have been increasing since the 1970’s. If you got married young or plan to marry in your late teens or early 20’s, we strongly recommend working with a marriage counselor to guide you through your lifestyle changes and ensure success in your matrimony.

Premarital Childbearing

Having a child or getting pregnant before getting married does increase your risk of divorce. Approximately 40.6% of all births in America are from unmarried women, resulting in 1.5 million children born out of wedlock. While there are couples who choose to get married after giving birth or discovering the pregnancy, those unions have a high divorce risk. That is because the foundation of the marriage is the child, but other factors are needed for a marriage to truly succeed.

If you have a child born or created out of wedlock, work with a counselor to determine if marriage is truly the right step for you as a couple. If you are already married, you can seek advice from a marriage counselor about ways to strengthen your relationship and build family bonds.

Family History Of Divorce

Consider this a “lead by example” mentality. Adults with divorced parents are at a higher risk of getting divorced themselves. This is not to say that you will get divorced if your parents are divorced, or that children not exposed to divorce will not get divorced as adults. The correlation is there, but you can fight it by making sound decisions through the course of your marriage. Once again, premarital counseling and family and marriage counseling can help you avoid the same mistakes your parents made in their marriage so you have a higher chance of success and long-term happiness.

Personal Insecurities

Back in November, we discussed the importance of self-worth and understanding your true value. Not only will this help you interact better with others, but it will actually lower your risk of divorce. Adults with personal insecurities often struggle in longstanding relationships because they are worried their spouses will find someone better out there. This could develop trust issues between bother partners, or one spouse may become exhausted from reassuring the insecure spouse about his or her self-worth.

If you struggle with low self-esteem, there are counseling and therapy programs available to help you build your confidence and find your purpose in life. Contact Perspectives Of Troy Counseling Centers to learn how we can help you work through your personal insecurities and strengthen your marriage at the same time.

Low Income

Financial stress is one of the most common causes of divorce, so it makes sense that low-income households have a higher risk of divorce than mid- to high-income households. Various research studies have aimed to pinpoint the specific income level that increases a couple’s divorce risk, but the results vary by location, family size, cost of living, etc. In general, couples with strong financial stability have a lower risk of divorce than those who struggle to maintain work and consistent pay. The risk of divorce associated with income increases when children are involved because of the increased stress levels on both parents.

Interestingly enough, women who come into a relationship with an independent source of income are less likely to get divorced than those who rely on their partners for financial support. A study from Psych Central showed that college-educated women with independent income who married after the age of 25 only had a divorce rate of 20%. Of course, this factors in income, age, and education (discussed below), but it does show that financial stability can significantly improve the chance of success in a marriage.

Limited Education

Education is somewhat linked to income when it comes to the risk of divorce. Married couples with some college education are considered to be less at risk of divorce than those with an incomplete high school education. There are other elements in play here – education leads to better job opportunities, which leads to a higher income level. With the way the job market is transforming in the modern world, having a college education is becoming less influential in a person’s ability to secure high-paying work. Over time, education may not have quite as much impact on a couple’s divorce rate.

Living Together

Premarital cohabitation is a double-edges sword. In many instances, living together can help a couple see if they are in fact compatible with one another on day-today basis before they commit to getting married. In essence, this is a “trial run” before the marriage becomes official. With that in mind, some studies show that people who live together with more than one partner are at a higher risk of divorce when they finally marry one of their cohabitating partners. Many researchers think that this is because people who have lived with more than one partner in the past have a more lenient view on divorce, and they do not see marriage as the strong commitment it actually is. No matter what your living situation may be before you walk down the aisle, you can work with a marriage counselor to ensure that you and your spouse stay together for the long haul.

Lacking Guidance

At the end of the day, we all acquire skills by learning from other people. Keeping a marriage going is a skill that every married couple needs to know. With the right guidance, you can avoid the risks of divorce and maintain the successful relationship you both deserve. Get advice from people in your life who have had long marriages, and work with a marriage counselor to preserve the bond in your relationship. Learn how to communicate with your spouse so you can address (and fix!) problems as soon as they arise. This is a continual process that will last for the rest of your life, but it’s worth it. Grow together, not apart, and you can have the longstanding relationship you’ve always dreamed of.

Common Causes Of Divorce (And How To Avoid Them)

divorce causes

Why do married couples get divorced? What are the most common reasons for divorce, and what can do you do to avoid them? There were 29,708 divorces in Michigan in 2014, at a rate of 6 people per 1,000 residents in the state. That’s lower than the national average of 7.6 people per 1,000, but there is still plenty of room for improvement. In the discussion below, we will review the most common causes of divorce and what you can do to keep your relationship strong well into the future.

Basic Incompatibility

According to a recent survey from the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts, “basic incompatibility” accounted for 43% of divorces in America. This broad topic covers a wide range of issues in a marriage, but overall, it represents couples who simply could not get along well enough to stay together. The incompatibility could be the result of getting married young, getting married because of a pregnancy, getting married for health insurance needs, getting married too quickly, etc. Whatever the circumstances were, the couples were unable to cooperate with one another to stay married.

How To Avoid It

The most obvious way to avoid getting divorced from basic incompatibility is to not get married until you know you both are fully committed to staying with one another. If you cannot picture yourself with the other person decades from now, you know in your heart that this is not the right setup for you. Save both of yourselves the pain of divorce by waiting on marriage until you’re both truly ready.

If you are already married and feel yourselves drifting apart, you may seek out marriage counseling to help you work out your problems. This will give you an open, unbiased platform to speak out and let your voice be heard. You’ll learn how to communicate better with your spouse to avoid misunderstandings that could come across as incompatibilities. Try finding some common interests that you can bond through, or try something entirely new together. This may help you bridge some of the gaps building in your relationship.

Infidelity

Infidelity accounts for 28% of divorces in America, according to the IDFA. In another national survey, 55% of participants cited infidelity as one of the reasons for their divorce. There are a number of reasons why people cheat on their spouses, from emotional disconnection to a fulfillment of sexual needs. Whatever the case may be though, this act is oftentimes considered an unforgivable break in trust that spouses are not willing to recover from.

How To Avoid It

Once again, the obvious way to avoid a divorce through infidelity is to remain faithful to your spouse. That may be easier said than done though. Even people with strong morals and a powerful sense of commitment may find themselves tempted to stray when problems arise in their marriages. If you find yourself seeking the attention of others, look within your current relationship to determine what void you are trying to fill. Are you no longer attracted to your spouse? Do you no longer feel attractive to your spouse? Are you looking for something new in your life? Are you trying to escape from personal stresses bound within your marriage? Go through these questions personally until you decide why you feel the need to cheat. Then you can address the issue at hand and avoid a painful situation later on.

If you or your spouse have already cheated, there is still hope for your marriage. With proper marriage counseling, you can begin to trust one another once again, and you can figure out why one of you sought to cheat in the first place. As long as both spouses are open to getting help, you can complete divorce prevention counseling successfully and enjoy the fulfilling marriage you’ve always wanted to have.

Financial Stress

The IDFA cites “money issues” as the third most common cause of divorce, accounting for 22% of divorces in America. Financial stress plays a major role in how people interact with one another. Simply put, someone with more stress is more likely to be irritable, angry, depressed, and emotionally needy than someone who is financially stable. Many divorces occur shortly after a major financial crisis in a family, like a failed investment or an unexpected death in the family. Couples with low incomes are at a higher risk of divorce than couples with higher incomes, and divorce rates tend to increase when the job market falls flat.

How To Avoid It

Financial stress is not always easy to avoid because you may have no control over the circumstances. For instance, if the company you work for lays off a large portion of workers due to budget cuts, you may be left jobless without warning. Try to prepare for financial emergencies before they happen. Pay your bills in advance, and put away money in savings to protect you if you are ever between jobs. If you do lose your job, work diligently to find another one as soon as possible. You may need to work part time at a job you are not thrilled with to make ends meet until you get hired somewhere else.

Avoid living above your personal means. Do not take out unnecessary loans or credit cards because the debt alone can create enough stress to hurt a marriage. In most cases, it helps to have more than one source of income for the household so the weight of the bills are distributed amongst two parties. If you only have one source of income, make sure it is stable, reliable, and sufficient enough to cover your costs. You and your spouse may need to seek the help of an accountant or financial planner to ensure your money does not divide your household.

Relationship Imbalance

Recently, we discussed the signs of one sided relationships and how to fix imbalances in a relationship. It takes two people to make a marriage last. If you or your spouse feel like you are pulling more weight in the marriage than the other person, you may drift apart over time. In a survey of divorced couples from MSN, 63% of couples said a lack of commitment from their spouse was one of the biggest reasons for their divorce. 21% of women and 35% of men said they wished they had worked harder to stay married. In that same survey, 44% of couples said that a lack of equality in the marriage was yet another cause of divorce. Without the proper balance of responsibilities, emotions, and commitment on both ends, your marriage could be at risk of divorce.

How To Avoid It

Talk openly with your spouse about the share of responsibilities in your relationship. If the imbalance occurs on the emotional level, work together to fulfill each other’s needs. You may use the guidance of a family and marriage counselor to identify one-sided features in your marriage and find ways to correct them. Keep in mind that the balance you create may not be apples-to-apples. For example, one person may provide the household income while the other takes care of cleaning, paying bills, watching the children, etc. Come up with a compromise that works for both of you, and you can avoid some of the most common causes of divorce.

How To Fix A One-Sided Relationship

couples counseling

In the first part of this guide, we discussed common signs of one-sided relationships. The second half of our discussion is designed to help you improve the balance in your marriage if you are in fact in a one-sided relationship. Learn what it takes to reconfigure the roles in your relationship so you can improve the quality of your marriage moving forward.

Pinpoint Why You Feel Like Your Marriage Is One-Sided

What specifically makes you believe you are in a one-sided relationship? Is it a lack of emotional support from your spouse, or is it more along the lines of an imbalance of responsibilities? Knowing why you feel like you are the only person putting forth effort will help you determine what you can do to fix your one-sided relationship.

Discuss Your Feelings With Your Spouse

There is a good possibility that your spouse is not aware of the imbalance in your relationship. Before you make plans to leave or blow up in a future argument, have an honest discussion with your spouse about the way you feel. Explain to him or her why you think you’re in a one-sided relationship and make suggestions about ways to improve this situation. You might be surprised to find that your spouse feels the same way. By getting your feelings out in the open, you can come up with a plan to make your marriage better as a whole.

Be Open To The Other Person’s Feelings

Your perspective on the balance in your relationship may be completely different than your spouse’s. You should be able to express your feelings to your spouse, but you should also be willing to hear what he or she has to say. Be open-minded as you approach this situation to see what your spouse is thinking. Give him or her the same respect you expect for the conversation.

Seek Professional Counseling

You may need to work with a marriage counselor to create balance in your relationship. It helps to have an unbiased party available to hear both sides of the story and come up with a general plan with how to get your relationship back on track. Here at Perspectives Of Troy Counseling Centers, we have a number of couples counselors and therapists on hand to help you work through struggles in your relationship. Speak out and let your voice be heard in a safe, confidential environment.

Am I In A One-Sided Relationship?

one sided relationship

Successful relationships are built on a foundation of mutualism, balance, and commitment – two people working together for the greater good. In many instances though, only one member of the relationship is putting forth an effort. If you feel like you’re the only one working on your marriage, you may be in a one-sided relationship. Let’s take a closer look at the signs of one-sided relationships and what you can do to create a balance in your marriage moving forward.

You Are The Only Person Making A Compromise

The term “compromise” implies that both parties in the transaction are willing to make sacrifices for the betterment of the relationship as a whole. If you are the only one making sacrifices though, you may be in a one-sided relationship. There may be times where you are in fact the only person changing in the relationship, but there should be times when your spouse is changing as well.

You Give Up Quickly In Fights

Have you ever apologized early on in an argument just to make it stop? This tactic may be necessary from time to time, but you shouldn’t apologize every time you get into an argument. That is a sign of a defeated person, which is common in one-sided relationships. You’re tired of being the only one fighting for the marriage, and you give up for the sake of keeping peace in the household.

You Hold In Your Feelings

If you find yourself holding in your feelings and emotions, you are at risk of exploding later on. In fact, you may have already experienced multiple meltdowns in your marriage as a result of your emotional bottling. You may do this as a way to protect yourself, or you may simply keep your opinions to yourself because you feel like they won’t make a difference in your relationship. The latter is a warning sign that you are in a one-sided relationship.

Your Love Isn’t Reciprocated

Is the love you show your spouse returned? Do you feel that he or she loves you just as much as you love him or her? One-sided relationships are not just one-sided from a compromise and argument perspective. The actual love that you extend to your spouse may only be one-sided also. Think about how often your spouse says “I love you,” not as a response to you but purely on his or her own. If this expression is only used as a response to you, your feelings in the relationship may not be as balanced as they seem.

How To Deal With A One-Sided Relationship

If you are in a one-sided relationship, check out the second part of this guide where we explain how to fix a one-sided relationship.

Finding The Right Therapist For You

Therapist

“I need to see a therapist.” This simple phrase carries a heavier weight than most people realize. There are a number of different counselors and therapists to choose from, regardless of where you live or what type of help you need. By selecting the right professional to help you through your journey, you will enjoy a pleasant, effective, and life-changing experience in therapy.

In the information below, we will help you answer the question, “Which therapist is right for me?” 

Qualities Of A Good Therapist

A “good” therapist may not necessarily be the “right” therapist for your needs. Nevertheless, it is important for look for respectable qualities in your therapist no matter what your situation is. Here are some surefire signs of a qualified therapist:

  • High Level Of Education (Usually A Master’s Degree Or Doctorate In Psychology, Psychiatry, Or Similar)
  • Long-Term Experience In The Field
  • Strong Recommendations From Local Doctors, Schools, Churches, And Businesses
  • Caring Personality (Someone You Connect With)
  • Local And State Licenses

Assess the credentials of your therapist like you would a doctor, lawyer, plumber, accountant – any service provider you trust with an aspect of your life. This will help you avoid a bad experience with an unqualified therapist.

How To Choose The Right Therapist For Your Needs

Once you have a set of therapists you can trust, you will need to determine which professional is best suited for your individual needs. If you need alcoholism treatment, seek help from someone who works with alcohol and substance abuse victims regularly. At Perspectives Of Troy Counseling Centers, we meticulously match each patient with a counselor or therapist who specializes in the treatment they need.

Types Of Therapists And Counselors

No matter what you are going through in life, there are counselors and therapists available to help you cope with, recover from, and overcome your struggles. Find a professional who specializes in your specific needs, and you will get the best treatment possible.

If Your First Therapist Does Not Work Out…

There are times when the first therapist you get paired with will not necessarily be the right therapist for you. If you do not feel like you have a good connection with your therapist or counselor, speak to your counseling center about working with someone else. Make sure explain what you have a problem with so the center can match you with a better fit from the start. Do not be afraid to say “I would prefer speaking to a woman” or “I would like a counselor closer to my age” if it would lead to a better experience for you overall.

Once you find the right therapist for your needs, you will be able to enjoy a better quality of life.

10 Topics To Discuss During Premarital Counseling: Part 5

Premarital Counseling Session

Continued from Part 4

This marks the conclusion of our five part series exploring important topics to discuss during premarital counseling. In order to make the most of relationship therapy, you must be willing to openly talk about the concerns and frustrations you have about your relationship. Hopefully this guide has provided some insightful inspiration to lead you through your counseling sessions. With the right preparation ahead of time, you can enjoy a long, happy marriage with the one you love.

Religion

If you met at church or share the same religious upbringing, you may not have much to discuss with regards to your faith. Nevertheless, it is important for both you and your fiancé to have a clear understanding of your belief structures. This is especially true for couples with different religious backgrounds, like Christian and Jewish, Catholic and Atheist…etc. Make sure you are aware of each other’s religious values, and try to establish a mutual belief system to share as a couple.

Discussion Topics

  • What are our individual or shared religious beliefs?
  • Do we plan to attend religious services after marriage?
  • How can we combine our religious traditions or keep our separate beliefs from interfering with one another?
  • What religious ideals will we teach our children?
  • How will our religious practices impact our day to day lives?
  • Will we seek out faith-based couples therapy in the future to solve problems in our marriage?

NOTE: Perspectives Of Troy offers Christian counseling services for couples at every stage of their relationship. Contact us at (248) 244-8644 to learn more.

Household Chores

The last thing you want to get into is a marriage that feels “unbalanced.” Whether you have a traditional stay at home spouse or you both work, you need to decide how you will handle household chores. If you already live together, you may have a system in place for cleaning duties and other responsibilities. Nevertheless, you can still work on improving those in your marriage and family counseling.

Discussion Starters

  • How will we split up the chores?
  • Are there any chores that one of us will have to do no matter what? Example: One spouse cleans the bathroom because the other cannot handle the odors from the cleaning chemicals
  • If only one of us is working, will he or she still have household chores?
  • Should we alternate our household duties?
  • Who will cook and prepare meals?
  • Do we plan to keep our home spotless? If so, how can we accomplish that?

Work with your spouse to resolve your issues before you walk down the aisle, and you will be on your way to a lifetime of marital bliss.

10 Topics To Discuss During Premarital Counseling: Part 4

Couples Marriage Counseling

Continued from Part 3

In our comprehensive guide to premarital counseling, we have been looking over important issues to talk about during your counseling sessions. So far, we have explored subjects related to finances, family, conflict resolution, and personal values. In this part of the guide, we will explore even more conversation points you can use in your premarital counseling appointments.

Romance And Intimacy

Intimacy is a difficult topic for some couples to discuss, especially if they are not sexually active prior to getting married. That’s why we grouped “romance” into this section because you may have issues with the way that element of your relationship works. If one of you is more “experienced” than the other with regards to intimacy and romance, you may want to get your concerns, insecurities, and frustrations out before they turn into big fights later on. Our open-minded marriage counselors will help you through what may feel like an embarrassing conversation and help you reach a resolution point.

Discussion Starters

  • Is there enough romance in our current relationship?
  • What can we do to keep the romance alive?
  • Are we happy with the amount of intimacy we have in our relationship, or do we want more after we get married?
  • Do we connect well on an intimate level? NOTE: This could just mean kissing, holding hands, going out on dates, etc.
  • What concerns do we have about each other’s previous relationships?

Social Interactions

You may have longstanding friendships that have been around much longer than your relationship with your fiancé. In that case, you need to make sure that your social life and your marital life balance each other out. If you have mutual friends, you should discuss how you will interact with them once you are married – especially in the case of friends of the opposite sex.

Don’t forget about your online interactions as well! See Is Social Media Ruining Your Marriage? to learn more.

Discussion Topics

  • How often will we spend time with our friends separately?
  • How often will we spend time with friends as a couple?
  • What do we do if we don’t like each other’s friends?
  • How can we divide up “us time” and “their time”?
  • Should we make new friends as a couple? If so, how?
  • Are there any friends in our lives that may be a bad influence on our marriage?

Continue to Part 5

10 Topics To Discuss During Premarital Counseling: Part 3

Premarital And Couples Counseling

Continued from Part 2

As we continue to explore important topics to discuss during premarital counseling, think about your biggest fears, concerns, and struggles are with your current relationship. Addressing these issues early on will create a solid foundation for your marriage that will ultimately keep your relationship strong.

Family Planning

Many couples choose to have children after they get married, but that is not always the case. You will need to discuss this with your future spouse in advance to make sure you have the same family goals. Even if you already have children (as a couple or separately), you need to decide if you want to have more kids in the future. You can always change your mind, but this gives you a good starting point to build from.

Discussion Starters

  • Do we want to have children in the future?
  • How long will we wait to have kids?
  • How many children would we like to have?
  • How will children impact our careers? Example: Someone may stop working to take care of the children
  • What core values will we instill in our children?
  • If we cannot have children of our own, do we plan to adopt or pursue fertility treatments?
  • If we do not want children, what will we do to prevent pregnancy? Example: Birth control, abstinence, preventative medical procedures, etc.

Note: Perspectives Of Troy offers blended family counseling services for couples with children from past relationships. Contact us at (248) 244-8644 to learn more.

The In-Laws

Your family planning shouldn’t stop at the discussion of children. You also need to talk about how your relationships will work with your existing families. Of course, this is easier to manage if you both get along with each other’s families and if your families get along with one another. If there are complications with your future in-laws though, you may want to go through family counseling to work out your issues before your big day.

Discussion Starters

  • How often will we visit our families?
  • How will we split up our time during holidays?
  • How can we resolve current issues with our families?
  • Do we plan to take family vacations? (In this case, we are referring to vacations with extended family members, not your children)
  • What can we do to minimize fighting between our families?
  • Are there any unspoken issues we have with each other’s families?

Continue to Part 4

10 Topics To Discuss During Premarital Counseling: Part 2

Marriage Counseling With Therapist

Continued from Part 1

So far in our premarital counseling overview, we have examined the importance of core values and conflict resolution in your therapy sessions. In the second part of this series, we will continue to explore topics to discuss during premarital counseling so you can set your marriage up for success.

Financial Decisions

Finances are considered a leading cause of divorce in the U.S. When couples cannot come to a decision about how to earn, spend, or save their money, they struggle to work together as a team. If you and your fiancé do not live together yet, you may not share any of your financial accounts. You need to talk about how your finances will be set up so you can avoid debt, overspending, and longstanding arguments.

Discussion Starters

  • Where do our finances stand right now? Example: Retirement savings, debt, account balances, etc.)
  • Will we combine our incomes or keep them separate?
  • What will our monthly budget look like, including bills and personal expenses?
  • Who will earn money in our relationship? (See the next section for more details)
  • Who is responsible for paying the bills, or how will we split the bill payments?
  • How much money should we put aside for emergency funds, college funds, personal savings, and more?

Career Moves

As a single person, you can go wherever your career takes you. If that means that you need to move for a better job opportunity, you can do that – no strings attached. In a marriage though, career moves have to be discussed as a family. Your new career may have a profound impact on your relationship dynamic, your location, your time with your spouse, and more. It is important to talk about these issues in marriage and family counseling so you can make sound decisions with your spouse.

Discussion Topics

  • Which one of us will work? (You may both keep your jobs, or one may stay home to take care of the household and the children)
  • What are our individual career goals? Example: Moving up the corporate ladder, taking on a second job, going back to school, etc.
  • How do our career goals impact one another?
  • Do we plan to change careers, and how will those changes affect our relationship?
  • Can we adjust our work schedules to spend more time together as a family?

Continue to Part 3

10 Topics To Discuss During Premarital Counseling: Part 1

Psychologist Speaking To A Couple

Premarital counseling is designed to set your marriage up for success – right from the start. It provides an unbiased platform for you and your spouse to tackle marital struggles before they ever come up. Your counselor will guide you through these discussions during your premarital counseling sessions, but you may have a particular issue that you want to focus your attention on. By getting a feel for the conversations to come, you can start thinking about questions, answers, and important points you want to bring up.

In this series, we will explore 10 topics to discuss during premarital counseling so you can make the most of this experience.

Conflict Resolution

Perhaps the most important topic of discussion in any marriage counseling service is how to handle arguments in the relationship. You probably already have experience with this as a non-married couple. Determine how you can effectively end arguments in your marriage before they turn into deal-breakers, and ask your marriage counselor for suggestions on ways to improve your conflict resolution skills.

Discussion Starters

  • What has helped us end fights so far?
  • What habits, actions, or hot-button issues make our fights last longer than they should?
  • What are our biggest pet peeves and annoyances?
  • What are our no-tolerance conflicts? Example: Infidelity, abuse, alcoholism, drug use, etc.
  • What repercussions can we agree to if a no-tolerance conflict occurs? (Having preset “punishments” is a crucial step in divorce prevention)

Personal Values

Have you ever really sat down and discussed your values with your fiancé? For a lot of couples, values are implied or assumed, not talked about. You may have a general idea of what your future spouse stands for, but it would be in your best interest to openly chat about these ideals before you get married. This will give you a chance to cooperate and come together about values you may want to instill in your future children, should you choose to start a family. If you have vastly different core values, you can work together on a compromise before they cause fights down the line.

Discussion Starters

  • What are your core values?
  • Where do your values come from? Example: Past experiences, instilled family values, religion, etc.
  • Do we have the same values in life?
  • What are the most important values we want to uphold as a couple?
  • How will our values impact our abilities to start a family and raise children in the future?

Continue to Part 2