Do you feel like you always end up with the wrong type of person? Just when you think you’ve found the perfect guy or girl, something happens to make you question your judgment abilities. There are several reasons why your “relationship picker” may not be acting in your favor, and most of them are not your fault. Let’s figure out why your relationship picker is broken and what you can do to fix it.
Your Parents Had Bad Relationship Pickers
As much as we all fight not to be exactly like our parents, most of us follow in their footsteps. If your mom or dad (or both) had a hard time finding a good relationship, you may unintentionally do the same. Even when you think you are choosing the complete opposite of someone your parents would choose, you find yourself hurt and heartbroken.
You cannot change your past, but you can change your current perspective. See if you can find patterns in your parents’ relationship selections that mimic yours. Did your mom choose project men who needed to be cared for? Did your dad choose women much younger than him? Did your parents stay in a toxic relationship longer than they should have? If you can find a connection between those experiences and your recent relationships, you will know what to watch out for early on.
You Were Deeply Hurt By Someone In The Past
All it takes is one bad relationship to throw off your relationship picker completely. You were abused, cheated on, neglected, lied to, etc. This also applies to personal relationships, like the one you have with your parents. If your father abandoned you as a child, you may have a hard time trusting men in your life. If you were sexually abused by a female neighbor, you may see relationships in a different light.
Working with a counselor can help you overcome these past traumas. We offer several adult counseling programs in Michigan designed for people just like you. Find the root cause of your current struggles and learn how to move forward to a better place in life. Your past doesn’t have to control your future.
You’re Holding On To A Past Relationship
Do you have unfinished business from a past relationship? Feel like you’re never going to find someone like you had before? Once again, you cannot let the past hold you back from your future. There could be an amazing relationship waiting for you that’s even better than what you had before. If your significant other was emotionally abusive, you may have been told that you are not good enough for anyone else and no one will ever love you. That is NOT the truth, and you will discover that with counseling and therapy.
One of the core goals in our adult counseling programs is to reverse negative thought patterns. These lead to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, addiction, and much more. Your mind is keeping you from happiness because it’s still latching on to something from your past. Your counselor will work with you to make sure this doesn’t happen.
You Don’t Know Your True Worth
Sometimes people choose to be in bad relationships because they do not think they’re worthy of a good one. If they’re lucky enough to find a good relationship in spite of this, they often sabotage it before things go too far. We are here to tell you that you are worthy of love, and there is tremendous potential to find it. First, you must learn to love yourself.
Contact our adult counseling center in Michigan to schedule an appointment with one of our specialized counselors and therapists. We will match you with the best professional for your needs, and we will work to get your relationship picker back on track.